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Kiss Me
by Savage Vampire (aka Liv)
Author's Note: I do not know the private lives of Daniel Jones and Darren Hayes. I am not in any way associated with them. This story is purely FICTION and are just weird fragments of my imagination. I do not own the song "Kiss Me" by Sixpence None The Richer. Please do not sue ;)
Author's note: The story written in first person from Daniel's and Darren's POV (point of view). For the purpose of clarity:
Daniel's POV is in this color
Darren's POV is in this color
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Chapter 1
Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight.
Lead me out on the moonlit floor.
Lift your open hand.
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance,
silver moon's sparkling.
So kiss me.
~ Kiss Me, Sixpence None The Richer
Hayes likens his partner to a butterfly. "Push too hard and you'll break him," he cautions when Jones abruptly, albeit politely, puts an end to a photo session the next day.
I smiled to myself as I reread the line over again in the latest issue of Australian Vogue magazine. Push too hard and you'll break him. How typically metaphoric of Darren to say such a thing. But of course, he'd always been the poet, right? Twisting his words in metaphors and riddles. That's what a lyricist does; play games with your mind.
I threw the magazine back on the rack and slumped back down against the couch.
Another photo shoot, another day of primping and preening. I detested every moment of it. Here I was once again, in Red Light studios for Australian culture and fashion magazine Cream who requested an "exclusive" photo shoot with us. Minders and assistants everywhere were hurrying to and fro like headless chickens. The photographers were barking orders at one other about the setting and backdrop for the shoot. Leonie was talking loudly over the chatter on her mobile to the record company. And Darren was still in the make-up room while I sat here, waiting for my turn.
I sighed. It was going to be another long day - and a boring one at that.
I stared at my reflection in the dressing mirror before me. Micheal, the make-up artist, peered behind me, wiping his hands on the grotty, eyeliner stained towel and rearranged the lightening above me.
"Well Monsieur Hayes," he whispered in his low, husky French accent. "They wanted a very different, very unique gothic look for this shoot, so there you go..."
I stared. And kept staring. I couldn't answer him.
Oh my god. I can't even recognize myself!
Micheal's make-up brush had tainted my skin in such pure whiteness, it had literally taken my breath away. My large eyes were encircled by a generous thick lining of black eyeliner, making them almost too circular for my face. The lashes were thickened with a heavy coat of mascara that threatened to touch my pale, pale cheeks. And my lips... they were touched with lashings of blood-red lipstick, shining and glimmering in the artificial light.
I looked... I looked... well, I don't know how I looked!
"Geez," I muttered under my breath, my hand tentatively touching my flawless right cheek. I looked like I was made of sculptured marble. "How on earth did you make me look like one of the living undead??"
Micheal smirked. "I like it. And it suits you too. Makes you look so damn pretty."
I turned to look at him. "Pretty?"
He simply shrugged and slipped off the sheet protecting my clothes from stains. "That's what Cream wants you two to look. It is an art magazine. Outrage photographers are here as well and they might want some shots too."
I cocked my head to one side. Outrage wanted photos of us again? Oh well, at least it was good publicity. "Hmmmmm, I didn't know that. But shit-" I glanced at my reflection again and carefully licked my red lips. "Mike, you sure have outdone yourself this time."
He grinned and motioned me to stand. "I take that as a compliment then. Righty, get Dan in here now and let's get him all dolled up too!"
Chapter 2
"Outrage wants to put us on the front cover again?" I repeated, leaning forward.
Leonie took out her pen and scribbled something down on her clipboard. "Yuh-huh Dan. Seems that last year when you guys were on the front cover, sales shot right up. So they want to put your pretty faces on the front cover again."
She looked up. "It's great for the promo so far. Two hot shot magazines desperate to have you two splattered on the covers; it doesn't get any better than this!"
"Hmmmmm," I muttered, unsure. For some odd reason, I had a queasy feeling at the pit of my stomach. It was then I snapped. Why the hell am I so damn apprehensive all of a sudden? It's only a photo shoot for a national gay men's magazine for heaven's sake!
"What sort of shots are they after?" I finally asked.
"Something very different... the 'gothic' look," she replied. "They're dressing you up as goths, I should say."
Just then, the door swung open and out waltz Darren Stanley Hayes. And my, what a spectacle he was.
The entire room, which had been buzzing with endless orders and directions, fell into silence as the darkly clad figure slowly walked towards me. Tight PVC plastic pants matching a thin, almost see through button up shirt with those old-fashioned lace cuffs and collar. A silver chain around his neck; the top was unbuttoned and one could see the shining gleam just slightly above his chest. He stopped a couple of inches in front of me and grinned.
"Boo." he whispered, almost sensuously.
Strands of growing black silky locks framed his white, white face. Black eye make-up made his entire face look absolutely haunting. And, god forbid, was his pouty lips dipped in real blood? They were so red, in contrast with his devilish moon face and black, black eyes.
I was mesmerised by this hypnotic beauty in front of me.
Leonie broke the silence. "Wow." she whistled. "Just look at what a little eyeliner can do to you."
There were an equal chorus of laughter and amazement all around. Sure, at photo shoots we had make-up transformations, but never this much or this theatrical! It almost made my blood boil...
What?! What did I just think? Made my blood BOIL??
"Shit Daz," I tried to laugh, covering my blush. "You look... sort of androgynous if you ask me!" Those words just popped out of my mouth without thinking.
He laughed and smiled. "Now it's your turn sweety."
I knew I loved you before I met you... I hummed the little tune in mind as I waited. Everyone else went back to business, getting everything prepared for the shoot. As the minutes seemingly slowly ticked by, my thoughts turned back to Daniel's first expression of seeing me dressed up like this. Oh hehehehe. He looked like he'd just seen a ghost. I didn't look that bad, didn't I?
The door opened and heads were turned to see how he would turn out. I felt rather giddy at how today was turning to be. To be honest, I was enjoying all this... the most interesting photo shoot I had ever done.
Once again, everyone stared at the blond prince before them. And, shamelessly, so did I.
Black from head to toe he was - tight shiny pants, revealing his slender frame, matching an equally tight velvet button up top. Over that, he also had on a three-quarters length leather black coat, with the collar adorned in fake fur. Tiny crucifix studs were placed in each ear and he had on one of those silver studded dog chokers circulating his long, long neck. He had on the same Dr Martin boots as I.
His dirty blond hair was just lightly tinted to a darker shade, yet still a glimmer of gold could be seen. It was his eyes though, that grabbed the most attention: his usual grey-green emeralds had been transformed into brilliant jewels; the thick eye lining similar to mine made his eyes appear so penetrative. It was like he could just delve into your damned soul by one single glance. Ah, what has Micheal's brush done to us? Never before had he experimented with the 'gothic' look; this morning was his first attempt, and my oh my, the guy sure has talent for the art.
Daniel walked towards me as I did to him before and smiled. Lashings of - what on earth? - dark violet lipstick had been applied carefully on his lips. And his skin. Daniel, the ever outdoorsy type, now had the same white marble skin as mine. So smooth and almost glassy.
I stared at him as he stared back at me. Something didn't seem quite right, yet I could not put my finger on it. All of this... our 'gothic' revamp image for this particular photo shoot... what was it doing to me??
Then it hit me.
I had never, ever before looked and studied Daniel this way before. What I just did then now, relaying information to my brain about every single detail of his make-up and clothing is beyond me. Hell, we've had hundreds of shoots before, but none of them enchanted me as much as this one had - it almost seemed like I was witnessing Daniel's dazzling beauty for the first time.
I shivered under his glance. Those eyes. Those damn, damn eyes... they could seduce any woman or even any man, no matter how straight they claim to be.
What?!
"Alright guys, stop checking out each other!" Kirk, Cream photographer, suddenly pulled me back into reality, "We have work to do, plenty of time later!"
I could feel the burning blush creeping up my neck and face as good-humoured laughter was heard all round. Shit, I wasn't making too obvious that I simply could not take my eyes off this man, was I?
Chapter 3
I faked a laugh to cover up my embarrassment. That Kirk, such a joker he is. But I could feel my face flushing under the layers of cake of my white foundation and cautiously I took a sideways glance at my partner in crime.
Such beauty. I could not help but, well, fantasize about this luxurious creature in front of me. It was almost as if for the first time, my eyes were finally opened to see him in his true light. He was the perfect picture of innocence and betrayal all in one. Like little boy lost and Mr Sexuality all oozing into one.
Huh?!
The other part of my mind snapped back at me. What the fuck were you just thinking AGAIN?? For the first time this morning, it officially dawned on me: I had never thought or felt this way before about my best friend and business partner. Sure I knew Darren wasn't too bad looking before, but this...! What has this man done to me now! Micheal had deliberately emphasized Daz's best features, adding almost a feminine quality to them. Ah yes, my mind purred. Yes, that was the word. He was a most perfect mixture of femininity and masculinity.
My head felt light and dizzy as in a daze, I was moved this way and that for the shoot. Hands were groping all over me, making sure my top wasn't too crushed, my hair was perfect, my lipstick still shiny - I felt like a delicate china doll being played around with; one hurried move and I'm broken.
"Alright you two, just sit nice and pretty over there behind that blue backdrop..." Kirk eyed us through the camera, his nimble fingers ready to click the button.
Darren stood in the centre and, the ever natural he is, stared at the camera with intent. Slightly lowering his eyes a little, he peered from under his thick long lashes, making him appear oh so sweet and pure yet dangerous altogether. I sucked in my breath. Shit, I mentally cursed to myself as I (tentatively?) moved around then behind him as I always have done. Can't you shut up about him?! You've seen him before posing like a little Drama Queen he is!
Click, click.
Click, click.
"Purrrfect..." Kirk murmured under his breath as he continued taking more shots of us. "You two beauties look sensational, baby!"
Hmmmm. Must I also mention that Kirk is a well-known flamboyant gay photographer?
He looked up at us at that moment and grinned cheekily. "Such pretty boys."
If I hear the word "pretty" one more time, I swear I will commit suicide. Pretty this, pretty that, pretty everything - what is it with Kirk and Micheal anyway?! Was it part of their publicity vocabulary or something?
Julie, one of the writers for Cream, came in just then and smiled at us, flashes from the camera momentarily blinding our vision.
"Well, well, well, it's the Logan lads finally!" she beamed. Huh.
Click, click.
"Do you know how long we've been waiting for you guys to be on our front cover? We wanted a photo shoot on Savage Garden like never before, so we decided to give you two a complete makeover."
And what a makeover this is, I silently agreed as I moved my hips slightly here and there for the added effect. I turned around and caught Daniel studying me, his eyes once again putting me in a trance. His dark lips were slightly opened and looked so inviting for all to see.
Damndamndamn!
What was going on? I had never looked at another man like that like before! My whirling thoughts were swimming in a chaotic mess in my head and I closed my eyes momentarily.
"Mmmmmmmm-mmmm!" exclaimed Kirk, his camera furiously trying to capture every single movement. "Darren, you are one professional alright! Come closer to him... yep, that's it..."
I stared at Daniel's face, his lithe body, his silky movements. He looked so much like a blond porcelain doll. So crushable. So breakable. So bad yet so good at the same time.
And why did I suddenly think of that?
Click, click.
Click, click.
Kirk suddenly stopped and gazed at us thoughtfully. He squinted his eyes and I could distinctly see a glint behind them. I patiently crossed my arms and waited.
"Hmmmm, Outrage should be here any moment now... " He stopped, leaned closer and gently pushed Daniel's bangs out of his eyes. "I've got this idea... but I'm not sure whether you two would, um, shall we say, consent ..."
My heart started to race at his words. Oddly and strangely enough. Consent. I glanced back at the golden-haired beauty behind me. His face mirrored my quizzical yet almost yielding expression.
"Erm, for Outrage?" he asked.
Just then another photographer entered the room, a sleek good looking young man along with a couple of others. I recognized him as... Cameron? He took our shots last year.
"Heya," he drawled in his broad accent. He stopped in front of us. I felt his eyes running over me like water. Oh well. He works for a national gay men's magazine Daz, what do you think? Of course he has to have an eye for... um, men.
Chapter 4
Kirk turned him aside for a while and the two talked in low voices, obviously about what they planned to do with us. My head was spinning a bit from all this today. What on earth did Kirk have in mind to do to us? Consent?? My face was burning even from the mere thought of it. I didn't know how this particular shoot, or day for that matter, was going to end. Things were just getting weirder and weirder.
And you're enjoying it, aren't you?
I licked my lips. I looked down and my hands were trembling from anticipation and suspense. Did I want anything to happen? And if so, what exactly do I want to happen?
Darren stood in silence as the photographers still whispered to one another. I swallowed, the uncomfortable feeling in my stomach increasing by the minute. Cameron, if I recall his name correctly, kept glancing back at us, his dark eyes first widening in wonder then a knowing look came into them as Kirk whispered more instructions into his ear.
"Wonder what the hell that guy's got in plan for us, eh Jonesy?"
I snapped my head back towards him. "Hell yeah. With our consent...?"
I deliberately hung the question in mid-air, just to test him what he thought of it.
He nodded, but wouldn't meet my gaze. "Hmmmm yeah," was all he said. His black locks glistened in the light. They looked so soft.
After what seemed like years, Kirk and Cameron finally stopped and walked towards us, a rather queer look on their faces. Cameron, his hand on his camera, broke into a grin.
"We have an idea for the front cover of next issue." he said. "But, of course, it all depends on whether you two want to do it or not. Entirely up to you."
There was a pause. I didn't want to say anything first before Darren did. He turned his eyes towards me warily then back to the other two.
"And what is it you exactly want us to do then?" he finally asked. It was getting hot and stuffy and I undid my collar which was heating up my neck awfully.
Cameron smiled, almost seductively if you will, his white teeth grazing just a little on his lips. "We want the guys of Savage Garden to pose as lovers. A kissing shot. What about it?"
Silence.
The words hit me like a bolt of lightening. My heart and head was pounding so hard, god I was going to faint soon. I blinked. I swallowed. Yet I was still here, existing in the present moment. It can't a dream then, just something I can wake up to and shrug off; Cameron's request of us kissing was real.
It took couple of seconds more for me to start thinking rationally. Okay, okay Dan, I told myself as I unconsciously wiped the drop of sweat off my neck. Just calm down. It's only a photo shoot, nothing more. Just say yes or no.
And what the hell should I say? Or rather, what did I want?
Did I want Darren's lips on mine? Could it be possible that it would surely happen in a matter of minutes if all I had to do was to reply yes?
This was getting stranger by the minute. What a morning so far. What a fucking morning.
"And may I ask why you want us in such a way?" Darren's voice cut through the thicken silence. There was a slight tremor in his tone.
"Well, this is Australia's number one gay men's magazine you're talking about here, " Cameron answered proudly. "And you are Australia's number one band of the 90's. Together, sales will just shoot to the stars! It did last time you were on the front cover."
"You're not answering my question," Darren lowered his gaze. "Why do you specifically want Daniel and I to pose as lovers? And why, especially, kissing?"
I was sweating so much, I was afraid my make-up would slip off. But it wasn't as bad as the thoughts in my head, screaming for explanation here. Kissing Daniel? Hel-lo, this is your best friend you're talking about here.
The thought was tempting.
But I needed to hear Cameron's answer first. Why, of all stars and poses, did he want us to act in such a way? Last year, our shot was fairly uneventful - we wore blue and black and simply stood side by side one another. Nothing too revealing. Harmless. And it sold well, as Cameron keeps on saying. Then how come he felt that a kissing shot of us on the front cover would sell better? What would the general public think? What would the fans think? Hell, what would our family and friends think, namely my ex wife??
Cameron looked at us thoughtfully for a long moment then softly broke into another one of his maddening smiles. I felt like punching him.
"You two are born to be on the front cover of Outrage." he started, walking slowly around us both. I saw Daniel’s eyebrows shooting ten feet in the air. We were probably both thinking the same thing: What on earth did he mean??
But he continued: "Savage Garden has a rather large gay following, did you know that?"
I shook my head. Daniel continued staring at him.
"Well, especially for today, Micheal presented you two well. Very well. It's perfect for Outrage. The goth look is in and you do have the features for the look. Also..."
He paused and looked at us carefully.
"You two would make a very good couple. Not that I'm saying you guys are-" he laughed at that as if it were some kind of private joke. "-but it's just the picture of dark-haired Darren with his loyal blond-haired Daniel that turns men on. Believe me, I know. I've never told you this before, but when Savage Garden were on the front cover last year, we've been flooded with requests from men who want you and Daniel to be in, ahem, shall I say, 'certain positions'? That is why I would so much love to take a shot of you two beautiful men captured in a kiss - it would satisfy our readers very much."
I was stunned. Men, gay men actually desired to see us together?? Daniel's eyes were so wide, I was afraid his eyeballs would pop out. Oh shit, what does HE think about it? If only I could read his mind!
I didn't have a problem with men salivating over our pictures in magazines or in real life. No, of course I didn't mind. And our little appearance in Outrage had just been a little fun - nothing taken too seriously of course. Dan and I would often joke about it to friends, saying how yes, we were together and yes, he does wear his Simpson's boxer shorts to bed. We would laugh and take jibes at one another like that. But now the thought burned me. Especially when Cameron just revealed how we seemed ‘suited’ to one another and their readers would actually enjoy seeing pictures of us together. God, how could I face Dan again after all this???
If I declined, it would seem I was homophobic and of course I wasn't - I didn't want the band to have a reputation as such. But if I agreed... I would be able to taste his lips against mine, wouldn't I?
I suddenly felt a strong hand grip my shoulder. I turned my head and once again, I drowned into those green bottomless pools before me. There was question in those eyes and he wanted me to answer. Do what you like, they seem to say to me, it's your choice for this one.
Cameron and Kirk stood before me, unblinking. I noticed that Micheal was standing a little behind them, head cocked intently to one side, eager to see and hear what would happen. It seemed to me that everyone was listening to my every thought.
Then the words jumbled out before I could stop them.
"Sure," I stuttered, shifting my weight on one foot then the other. "It's only one shot, right? No harm done."
Chapter 6
I was so nervous, my legs were shaking like jelly. I held my breath for his reply and sure enough, he agreed to it. He looked at me, challenging me in some way and I forced a weak smile and shrugged. "If it's fine with Daz, it's definitely fine with me," I whispered. But I know one thing. Things were probably never going to be the same again between us now. Our friendship would be tainted forever. Of course, after all this, maybe nothing would really come out of it, but I wasn't really sure how I would be able to look into his eyes after today.
Kirk's face lightened up as though he touched some dark, mysterious secret and he was the one who held the key. I noticed he gave wink to Cameron before ordering us to sit on the purple velvet couch in the corner. He saw me noticing him and he came towards me, grinning like a cheshire cat. "Awww, now why the suspicious glance, Dan? It's just gonna be one single shot of you and Daz locked in an embrace and that would be it. Nothing more, don't you worry!" He threw his head back on this and laughed. "It'll be the perfect shot for the Christmas special of the magazine, don't you reckon? And your male fans would sure love it!"
I blushed and didn't know what to say. But all of this seemed just like a bizarre dream that I would wake up soon. I'm pretty sure Darren felt the same as me, only that his face was so good at keeping his feelings to himself. I hope that none of this would do anything to our close friendship.
Like what? Scared that your hidden desires would slowly be unleashed?
I almost smacked myself for the millionth time that day. Why all these perverted thoughts running around naked in my mind, I do not know. But I was scared, yes that was it, scared about what was to happen and what would happen later on.
Wordlessly, we were seated comfortably on the couch, my coat softly crushed underneath as the Kirk ordered me to tuck my legs under and lean towards middle. Darren was positioned so he was properly seated with his feet flat on the floor. He was also right next to my slightly trembling form.
Cameron seemed to be enjoying himself. He kept smiling and laughing at us, giving us one knowing 'looks' after another. It suddenly occurred through my mind that he might be making passes at us and that this photo shoot was sort of like a private show for him. I stared at him icily.
He noticed this and grinned even wider. "Dan, c'mon, why the sour look all of a sudden? Listen, if you aren't comfortable, just say so and-"
"No, I'm fine, Cameron." I hastily replied. I just wanted to get this over and done with. Darren's warm body so close to mine was making me dizzy.
"Righty, we're all set, yes?" came Kirk’s jovial booming voice. I noticed Darren hadn't really said a word at all during this; he demurely licked his lips and looked up towards the camera stand before us. The movement of his tongue darting out to touch his soft, soft lips for a second then pulled back inside sent a shiver down my spine. Somewhere at the back of my subconscious, one of our immortal lyrics played around in my mind, his haunting voice full of longing and, dare I say it, lust: ... and I, want to feel that rush in my spine, oh...
"Okay now, you two. Stare into each other's eyes while I adjust the stand."
Slowly, I turned my head towards his and he did the same. The increasing tension between us was so dense, I could almost smell it. I delved into his sapphire baby blues carefully, making sure I was in control of myself. You've seen him before, c'mon, you see his face everyday, dammit! There's nothing to it, just imagine it's another day, another moment in time, and you're just having a nice, normal conversation with him...
But even if I tried, I couldn't form any words in my head to say anything. As much as I wanted to, to clear up the air, I couldn't think of a single thing or way to say. So silently I continued staring, staring at his lovely eyes, all my inhibitions leaving me as I was losing myself in them. Ah what was it, that made him so divine all of a sudden? Was it just Micheal's crafty make-up tricks that made him suddenly so alluring? Or was it something more? Maybe it was there underneath all the time, only you buried them deep inside you? No. That can't be. I can honestly say I've never looked at him this way before... never felt such the strong attraction as I do now. Ah-ha! Now you admit it! You're attracted to him, aren't you, hmmmm? It's no use hiding it anymore. Oh do shut up. I'm trying to think.
"Ready now?" once again, Cameron's voice cut through my thoughts. I swallowed and tried to crack a grin.
"Daz, please be gentle." I feebly joked, desperate to make the whole ordeal go smoothly as possible.
To my relief, he grinned back, though it seemed rather shaky to me then. "I'm ready and willing as you are, Jonesy! Just thank god you didn't have that garlic bread for breakfast!"
I had to giggle, despite myself.
But we had to focus. It was just meant to be a light kiss, nothing more and Cameron was going to take the picture at the very moment our lips would meet, so we didn't have to "continue", so to speak. He placed the camera stand just less than a metre away from us. Kirk stood a little behind him, a playful smile on his lips. It was then I realized for the first time that everyone else was gone - Leonie, minders, all the assistants - it was just us four in the studio.
"We told them we needed privacy." Kirk answered, as if he could read my thoughts. "We want you to be completely comfortable for this particular shot. Remember, the camera never lies, so any uneasiness you show on your faces will also show in the photo."
"Just relax, you two," Cameron added, gesturing me to sit closer to Darren, which I did meekly. "It's going to be quick, you needn't feel uncomfortable for long." He paused then added: "You know each other so well already as friends. It's not like I'm asking you to pucker up to a complete stranger. So you should be alright. However, I do know that this may be the first time each of you may have ever kissed someone of the same gender. Am I right?"
How could I respond to that? How dare he ask us of our private lives? But strange enough, I didn't resent his brashness as I would have done to another pesky journalist or someone in the media. I merely nodded while Darren did the same.
He smiled in understanding then turned back to the camera stand. "Well, there's a first time for everything..." he murmured under his breath.
Cameron was ready. It was so silent in the studio, I could only hear my own quiet breathing. And Daniel's, since he was so damn close to me. He had to lean over so his face was now inches apart from mine. The smooth contours of his angular face added an element of fragility to his being. Perfect high cheekbones, flawless pale, pale skin like mine...
"Go for it, boys." His hand positioned right on the flash.
This is it. It's now or never.
Very slowly, I put my hands up on his neck. I turned his head so he was directly facing me. I looked into his eyes and noticed the slight fear in them. Don't be afraid, my darling. It's gonna be alright... His pupils were so dilated, you couldn't see the colour anymore around. I let myself fall, yes fall into the darkness. Clearing my mind of all the apprehension, I took a deep breath and gently pressed my warm lips against his.
It was an experience I would never forget.
Kissing someone of your own gender amplifies every sensation of the experience. Why it happens, I do not exactly know. But maybe it has something to do with breaking the morals we've all been brought up with, in this sad and often cruel, cruel world. The harsh concept of masculinity/femininity within blended into one. And that, my friend, is divine.
No longer were we bounded into the typical male/female stereotypes we had so long restricted ourselves to. He was my lover, my boyfriend, my girlfriend, my brother, my sister - all into one. There was suddenly new life into the word "androgyny". And it gave me such a delicious feeling. The mere act of rebelling against society's so-called "norms" was enough to send me over the edge.
And then it happened. I was so caught up in my fantasies that I hadn't realized I had slipped my tongue into his partly opened mouth until it was far too late. I had closed my eyes and simply enjoyed the silky wet roof of his mouth with lashings of my curious tongue. Remember, curiosity killed the cat... But I didn't care anymore. I was dying in his kiss, I was probing into his luscious mouth and tasting my sweet, golden-haired angel...
Chapter 7
My arms around his neck stiffened as I suddenly felt his wet hot tongue gaining entrance into my mouth. Flicking open my eyes in a flash, I saw he still had his eyes closed and his nostrils were quivering. It doesn't take an Einstein to realize that he was enjoying this - the slight moans I started hearing wasn't just my imagination. My body and face grew hotter by the second, every touch and scent was sending me higher, higher than anyone ever made me. I sighed and loosen my lips even more to let him in. He was tasting me and I was letting him.
I was losing the battle and I knew it. My body betrayed me by responding to his every touch. I forgot everything and, for the golden moment, the world didn't even exist anymore. All I knew was that I was in his arms and he was in mine; our tongues and mouths were entwined to perfection, as they say, and it felt like coming home - that this was the way it should and would be. Every movement and flicker of his expert tongue would send pulses of pleasure through every cell in my body. I moaned softly and closed my eyes. I could feel his fingers running through my spiked hair as I moved closer, now almost sitting on his lap. But I was intoxicated by his sinful scent, he was so bloody edible at that moment! My limbs would be on fire and I wouldn't have even noticed; I was so overheated, I could feel the velvet material clinging to my chest.
There was a flash and at that second, I finally came to my senses. Wake up, Danny boy! You were suppose to be POSING remember, not going all the way! Abruptly I pulled myself away and turned to see Cameron and Kirk staring back at us with such a comical expression on their pretty faces, it would have been hilariously funny in another situation at another time.
Cameron gave out a long, loud wolf whistle. "You two were hot..." he purred. "But, ahem, it was only suppose to be a light little peck on the lips, my lads."
Horror and realization hit me like a bolt of lightening. Fucking hell, what were you THINKING?? Pashing your business partner like that is bad enough, but in front of all these strangers too?!
I couldn't, I simply COULD NOT look at his face again after all this. Beads of sweat ran down my face as I stood up, looked around helplessly for a moment before running out the door, my vision blinded by the sudden tears of humiliation. I could hear my name being frantically called out by all three of them, Darren's voice being the loudest of course. But I didn't stop nor care. Without so much a glance back, I ran out, with my outfit and all, out into the lobby and into the car park, where I headed straight for my silver Mercedes.
My hands were shaking so bad as I opened the door and slumped inside. It was then I remembered that the keys were in my bag and that was still in the studio.
"Fuck!!" I cursed loudly. I checked the review mirror and flinched at my reflection. Because I was sweating so much now, trails of mascara was making their way down my cheeks, making me look like a panda. My hair was a mop of mess and my lips... well, they were smudged and swollen, thanks to my earlier bout.
Oh lord, what had I been doing?? It was meant to be a photo shoot, for Christ's sake! Instead, some how or the other, it turned out to be a real kiss, full of passion and yearning... something which shouldn't have happened between us, no no no. It would be a mistake, a bloody fucking mistake if things did get out of hand. But as I sat there, calming my confused thoughts and trying to catch my breath, I realized the irony of it all - Cameron, damn damn him, said that the shot would only be done with our consent, right? Well, it sure was done with our consent alright - it takes two baby, oh yes siree, and Darren and I were both sure co-operative with our little tongue tango. I shuddered, remember our soft moans as we delved deeper and deeper into each other. The memory would always be etched in my mind, that I knew for sure; how could I ever forget?
Darren, Darren, Darren. Just look at the mess we both put ourselves into.
I called after him again and again but he was already gone. My lips could shamelessly still relish the taste of him, slightly swollen from the bruising of our deep kiss. And my, what a kiss! My brain was still recovering from the sensory overload it had just witnessed. Even Colby had never made me feel so high as this... Colby. Oh shit. Though we had long since separated, things were just getting more and more complicated.
It was then I noticed Kirk and Cameron watching me cautiously, studying my reaction. I turned sharply to look at them.
"Shit." It was the only thing that came to my mind.
Kirk suddenly looked decidedly guilty. "Listen, I'm sorry Darren. I didn't know this would happen and Daniel would get so upset-"
I put my hand up. "Look, it's not really your fault. I didn't know Daniel was going to be like this either." I stopped and pondered. "I didn't know we were going to kiss like that too," I softly added, more to myself than the photographers.
But Cameron bit his lip and shook his head. Slowly, he closed the lenses of the camera, glanced at Kirk, then back to me. It seemed like he was hiding something and desperately needed to confess to me about it.
"Darren," he started. "There's something we need to tell you. Please, just listen and don't interrupt us until we are done, alright? It doesn't feel right to keep it all in, especially after all this."
I waited with bated breath.
He started. "When Kirk took shots of you and Daniel earlier on for Cream, he could sense that something was going between you two. You mightn't be conscious of it or maybe you do, but, as a gay photographer, he could sense that there was a definite chemistry in there. The way you first eyed each other after Micheal's spectacular makeover - it was like you were seeing Daniel for the first time and vice versa. And I must also mention something else too - when you weren't looking, Micheal had a quiet word in Kirk's ear about it, apparently he purposely made you and Daniel as attractive and similar to each other as possible because he knew that somehow or the other, there was an unspoken lingering longing for one another between you and Dan."
He paused to take a breath. I was too shocked to say anything.
"So he dolled you and Daniel up. It was almost like he wanted to see you two get together - and hey, it sure worked. When Daniel first laid eyes on you, he was hypnotized - it was just too obvious for words. See, Micheal's bi, he knows what men like to see in other men." With that he winked at Kirk, who winked back. "But that's another story. Continuing on, wouldn't you agree on how awkward Daniel acted after seeing you? Did you notice it too?"
It was true. I did recall how puzzled I was at his sudden odd behaviour at my new look.
He went on. "So Kirk thought it would be worthwhile to try, to see if there would be any sparks going on if we all pitched in together. He told me his idea and of course I, working for a gay men's magazine, jumped at it. And I wasn't making it up when I told you how readers were eager to see you and Dan together - it was true, I've had a quite a number of requests demanding to see the Savage Garden lads in very interesting positions. But of course, I couldn't go overboard and ask straight out for kinky photos - oh no no. So instead I asked for a nice, clean kissing shot. That was it. A kissing shot may trigger some sort of reaction or response from either one of you to break the dam. And, well, needless to say, it sure did."
There he paused and looked at me expectantly. Kirk was also staring at me.
I didn't know what to say. I was at loss for words. They planned all this. They planned Dan and I get together. It was all part of their great big scheme. I should have been mad. I should have gone mad. Meddling in our private lives, putting their noses in where it's definitely not wanted. But I didn't. I felt no such anger towards them.
"I have to go and find him," I muttered as I stood up and walked out the door.
Chapter 8
"Dan, let me in!"
He was pounding on the windows. I sat still for the moment, then reluctantly unlocked the door. He paused, then slid in, slamming the door behind him. I looked the other way.
For a long time we simply stared out the window, each one not knowing what to say. To be honest, I didn't really know what I was feeling - anger? no. disgust? hell no. Then what??
"I'm sorry," I finally whispered. I felt I had hurt him in some way.
To my immense surprise, he took my cold hand in his and held it.
"Why should you be sorry?" he whispered. In the dim light of the underground car park, I couldn't see him clearly, only his faint outline. His hand, so soft and comforting, held mine tenderly. I should have taken my hand away, but I didn't have the heart to - or rather I didn't want to.
I couldn't answer him. The words were stuck in my throat. Very slowly then, he proceeded to tell me what Kirk and Cameron revealed to him. In low hushed tones, he explained how the two devils (along with darling Micheal) had planned all of this together. He held my hand a little tighter at the end, as if I was threatening to break away, which I didn't anyway. But I was confused, so perplexed was I at the very unexpected turn of the situation.
He stopped when he finished and went quiet for a while. I was deep in thought myself and didn't say anything.
"Daniel." Husky and low once again. Close and personal. "Are you really sorry about what happened between us then?"
I froze. How on earth could I respond to that?
And what was he getting at anyway?
But the depths of my being knew the answer before my mind registered. I could feel him turn his intense gaze , one that could melt your soul, to me. I bit my lip, an unconscious habit, until I tasted blood.
"No." There. I said it. "No, I'm not sorry about what happened. Are you?"
But of course I already knew.
And it happened again, his face was unexpectedly intimate to mine, his soft breaths caressing my cheek once more, brushing dry the tears that were there. And our lips were one once again, polished and smooth they were, almost velvety to touch and to feel.
When we finally broke apart, we stared at one another, acknowledging that a new bond, still young and devastatingly delicate, had been formed between us. Tentatively, I put my hand up to his face and stroked his cheek. He smiled in reply, such a affection and warmth emanating from that one smile, that I literally melted inside.
"It was within each of us all along, wasn't it?" I murmured as he snuggled closer to me, resting his head on my shoulder. "You felt it too, didn't you?" I wasn't sure if I was making any sense, but hell with it, I didn't know exactly what was going on either.
He sighed. "Jonesy, to be honest, I don't really know. All I do know is that I've never felt like this before... and you're my best friend too!" He chuckled softly.
But he did touch a sensitive point there. He was not just my best friend, but also my business partner. Things could get so messy if we're not careful... He noticed my silence and stopped laughing. Lightly running his finger along my jawline lovingly, he whispered: "No, let's not worry about that just yet. Things feel right to me now. Doesn't it feel right to you?"
"Yes..." and I caught those lips in mine again.
I've been in love before. Of course I had, I was married once, wasn't I? And the thing with love is that it impacts uniquely in every single human experience - some fall into it's trap in less than ten seconds, others take years for the full effect to develop.
I’m not exactly making much sense, am I?
Whichever way, no matter how hard you try, once it takes it hold on you, you could never be free - unless one of the party breaks the chain, of course. But that's another story. What I was feeling now was pure bliss - a pleasant feeling of falling, yes actually falling into some unknown abyss. I felt like some part of my soul was leaving me and entering into another's soul, entwining into one. My head grew light. Every sensation was delicious and fulfilling. And yes, it all depended on the warm body I was resting on. On him, my beautiful blond look-at-how-helpless-I-am angel.
We kissed once again. It seemed as though we could not get enough of our passion together. Hours probably went by, yet we didn't care. Kirk and Cameron, we mused, wouldn't have minded anyway. We laughed and giggled like teenagers. We whispered things we wouldn't dared have whispered to one another before. In a sense, we "discovered" each other all over again - as mushy as it sounds. But I can't help it.
It's still too early for us yet to say those three immortal words. I didn't want to rush things and I had the feeling he didn't either. But I know, in my heart, that it would be sooner rather than later for those words to finally be uttered.
I smiled, happy and content.
"What are you smiling about?" he grinned, knowing full well.
"Aww shit, Dan. Look at us, looking like a pair of kids at Halloween. We're still in costume, haven't you realised?"
He laughed. Oh well.
~fin~
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